Johnny can’t read

I walk around assuming everyone I know reads my blog. Even though most of them don’t even know about it. And even the ones who know about it, I’m not sure which of those actually read it on any sort of regular basis. Or they might actually read it, but they never comment on it – neither online nor face-to-face. Jonathan rarely reads it, but he did hover (not hoover) over my shoulder and say, “That is an awful photo.” Yeah, thanks.

All that is to say that I make an effort not to slander or gossip here in Internet-ville, 15% because I’m not supposed to and 85% because they might read it. Jonathan calls me on what he refers to as “being mean” quite a bit. For example, as previously mentioned we went to a social engagement at my Distant Arch-Nemesis’ house recently. I actually enjoyed it as I met a very interesting English woman with whom I spent most of the evening talking. On our way home Jonathan pointed out that even though I had been dreading the evening, it seemed like I had a good time.

“Yes, but did you notice that it was a party for her, but everyone there was either a co-worker of his or a neighbor of theirs. No one there was her friend. Which makes sense, really, as she is one of the most miserable and unpleasant people I’ve ever met.” Jonathan rolled his eyes, but what I said was not slander. I was stating the facts.

And when I tell him that as I was on my way out the door to go to church, his Mom looked me up and down and told me I look like a nun…. that is not gossip. Because it actually happened. Just like that.

So when I tell you that in response to one of my rare political posts, a reader wrote, “I know people who've died because they're simply not wealthy enough to buy it. That doesn't strike me as freedom,” that’s not slanderous – unbelievably he did actually assert that as an argument for nationalized health care.

His “assertion” – or should I say - “emotional appeal defying all logic” is what I refer to as the “Johnny Can’t Read Argument.” At a previous job, an executive justified his attempt to money launder by saying, “Johnny is in middle school and doesn’t know how to read. If we process the money this way, more of it will be available to help him.”

Please. Leave the loaded emotional plea out of it.

Next, someone’s going to tell me that not voting for Obama just because he’s black is racist, while voting for him just because he’s black is not...

Comments

[Roadrunner]

Well, it appears that Starbucks has opened and you have had a double cappuccino.