Silas: Part 1, I am called an “Odd Duck”

A month ago I’m snoozing away one morning a few weeks ago and I wake up to turn to my other side (which was taking a forklift and a good hour and a half at that point), when my water broke.

Yes. MY WATER BROKE.

Let me be clear about that because when we got to the hospital a few hours later no one believed me. I had been dripping and gushing clear fluid for four hours, but because this fluid was not triggering a certain response on a piece of litmus paper, I was told it was either urine or possibly a rupture in the amniotic sac that might seal itself back up.

So after two hours of being hooked up to various machines (to track the baby’s heartbeat, my pulse, and my contractions – which were every five minutes, the same as the previous couple of weeks), an ultrasound that showed the fluid level was merely “on the low side of normal,” and multiple negative litmus tests I was told to get dressed and go home.

As I was getting dressed... Major Gush.

Another litmus paper. Another negative result. Still told to go home even though the nurse saw that the fluid was now tinged with blood, meaning that it was in all likelihood amniotic fluid. WHAT THE HECK.

So we left, knowing we’d be back that night or the next day. More leakage all evening and through the night – contractions getting a little stronger – doctor said to come back to the hospital for another ultrasound. I was hooked up to a bunch of machines again. My contractions were getting stronger – strong enough to move from being uncomfortable to painful. VERY ANNOYING because one of the few benefits of a c-section is not having to experience contractions.

Another benefit is not having to be checked regularly to see how dilated your cervix is, but because I wasn’t turning a piece of paper a certain color, I got to experience this fun part as well. A paper was placed directly on my cervix. No change. Neither was it dilated. Of course it wasn’t. My cervix knew perfectly well I was having a c-section and so why should it have to put forth any effort whatsoever.

It took two hours for the ultrasound technician to appear – and it ended up being a guy we knew well from my first pregnancy. So I asked him if he was open to bribes.

“I’ll give you massive amounts of cash if you just tell the doctor the amniotic fluid is dangerously low and he MUST operate IMMEDIATELY.”

Turns out no bribe was needed – the fluid was actually too low. SHOCKING, no? Since it had been flowing out of me for more than 24 hours at that point.

So then all the medical personnel came to the conclusion that my water had indeed broken the day before, I was quickly given penicillin through an IV, and the nurse wondered aloud why none of the litmus papers changed colors and said, “You are an odd duck.”

But she was very nice and I didn’t hold it against her.

(to be continued)