And all along I thought it was Mommy-Brain

Here are the steps in identifying the onset of dementia:

Step 1: Consider the family history. Is there a background of senile dementia or Alzheimer's disease? There is often a genetic predisposition toward this condition in members of the same family.

Have you met my Dad?

Step 2: Look for signs of memory loss and language difficulties. Is the person losing words, or forgetting the names of common objects? Has he or she forgotten how to do simple mathematics?

Memory loss: check. Language difficulties: check (at least according to Benjamin).

Step 3: Watch out for confusion and loss of attention span. Is the person unable to focus on a normal conversation? Does he or she get mixed up when trying to perform basic tasks?

Is it possible to focus on anything in addition to two toddlers? So the answer to both questions is yes.

Step 4: Rule out undiagnosed hearing or vision loss. These may hinder a person's ability to communicate effectively, and can make someone seem more confused than he or she really is.

Is it possible to see anything in addition to two toddlers?

Step 5: Monitor inappropriate behavior and impaired judgment. If the person begins to act inappropriately or significantly out of character in social situations, he or she may be showing signs of senile dementia.

Well, what with the inability to focus, language difficulties, and memory loss - - yes, I guess I behave significantly out of character.

Step 6: Look out for mood changes, irritability or emotional agitation. Often, people in the early stages of senile dementia are aware that something is happening to them, and this can be both frightening and depressing.

Searching Benjamin’s gaping mouth for an invisible hair that is causing him severe mental trauma, reminding Jonah for the five billionth time that I can’t understand him when he whines… why yes, I experience frequent emotion agitation and irritability.

Step 7 : Watch the person walk. Changes in gait are often symptomatic of senile dementia, although they can also be connected with other neurological conditions such as Parkinson's disease.

I’d like to see you walk normally with each of your hands holding a two year old male human.